So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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