Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
