In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
