Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize
