In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
im holly from the hills drunk
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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