So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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