I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
