he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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