doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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