The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize
