this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
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