Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Randomize
