the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
