No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
