Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize