I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
