the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
you will always have a special place in my vag
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
