i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
