remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
My vagina is very pro this idea
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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