i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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