Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
