so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Randomize
