hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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