I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize