he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
