I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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