Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
