:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
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