You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
