Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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