it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
she peed on how many people?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
