what day is it and did you see me today?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
