Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I smell like Dick and happiness
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
