I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
