The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
