Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
