I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Let's get the cat blown out
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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