he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I can't turn off my feet"
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
