Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
