Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Randomize
