Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Randomize
