I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
