my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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