Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
