FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Someone shattered a urinal.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
