i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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