I wanna passion pit in your ass
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Randomize
