I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize