I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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