Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Randomize
